I ran my finger over the inscription of the silver heart.
Those words—I swear I could hear them mocking me—even laughing as my soul
wrestled with its meaning.
G r a t i t u d e i n a l l
t h a t i s
What is
that
supposed to mean?
On a better day it would have been a sweet sentiment—one quickly
forgotten. But that day wasn’t good. I suppose a “good” Christian would accept
the seemingly kind cliché and take it as a sign to praise the Lord through the
valleys of life. But I don’t want to be
a good Christian—just a real one.
I sneered at the words in disgust and abandoned the pendant
to the sales clerk. But those words, already impressed on my soul, would never
leave me.
Gratitude in ALL
that IS?
As the days followed the He urged me to find the gift in
each day—everyday. Tell me—how am I to find the gift in dark moments and seasons
of life?
How does anyone?
I wrestle for the gift as the First Boy defiantly ignores my
direction. He says nothing, but his eyes tell me ‘no, never, and I will always hate
you.’
Gratitude in ALL that IS?
Even this?
The Blonde Boy hurls a pinecone at me. He is angry for my
thoughtlessness of putting both open and closed pinecones into one single bag.
Seriously.
Gratitude in ALL that IS?
Even this?
Even when…
a car slams into mine?
When my child is sick?
When there is a water leak?
When my son gets picked on at
school?
When the ledger shows more red than
black?
When a friend rejects me?
When there is no hot water for
days?
When business is molasses slow?
When the child can’t keep any food
down?
When I boil pots of water to wash
the dishes
and wash soiled
sheets in cold?
When ants greet me in the food
pantry
and when they
surprise me in the loft?
When my boys won’t get out of bed
in the morning,
and when they
won’t get into bed at night?
When the plumber gives the bill?
When my mother-in-law’s health is threatened,
and I hear my
husband holding back the tears?
When the car bumper is cracked?
When my neck and back begin to ache?
When no one takes the trash out?
When the bank account is drained?
When shame wants to reside within
me?
When expectations hound me?
When the smallest one runs away
from me—
down the street
and around the corner?
Even in this?
Gratitude in ALL that IS?
God I don’t like what IS
right now. Just saying.
Thank you for the grace to be real and not have it all figured
out.
On the journey with you… lk
How do you embrace gratitude in all that
is in your life? Here or somewhere…be real. Share your journey.
