Writing the Mess

I am just an ordinary woman wanting to make a difference in the world—

Somebody’s world.

I choose to be real and vulnerable for someone—

Anyone—

to be impacted by the extreme and relentless love of God.

My journey is no different than yours.

It’s messy.

In a life marked with both wrestling and surrendering to Jesus,

I find purpose.

I write of God’s pursuit to fully capture my heart.

My journey is no different than yours.

It’s messy.

It’s real.

I am just an ordinary woman wanting to make a difference in the world—

Your world.

lk

Yield

I open the window to allow the fresh air to blow through the house.

I find a seat on the couch and the First Boy plops down next to me. He clutches a pencil in his hand as my fingers fly over the computer keys. Shoulder to shoulder we write. He hums a tune as he works his spelling words into vowel patterns. I pause as I try to give voice to the heart of this post. He sets his pencil down to clap the rhythm of syllables. Deliberate and purposeful his hands come together to the beat of words.

Peace, piece, our, hour, cent, and scent—all words for life.

My spirit pauses to listen in…

He claps to the rhythm of   L I F E.

The open window becomes a passageway to my heart. I hear the leaves of the trees rustling even clapping in the wind…

Do I clap to the rhythm of life?

Or do I will for the tempo to change?

Now the Blonde Boy catches my attention. He sits on his knees sinking lower and lower into the floor. He leans into his art taped to the wall. Black marker in hand he pens his name in the lower right hand corner—

Writing identity across his creation.

Is that not what our Lord does? Write His name ever so carefully across our lives. Is He not intentional and even deliberate with the picture of our destiny?

The Blonde Boy covers the pen with its cap and wanders over to the open window. He watches in wonder as the curtain transforms into a sail. The wind fills the fabric with its breath. His blue eyes widen as the sail swells. Anticipation lights up his face. I know what he’s thinking—

How high will the sail fly?

How high indeed. How high or low will the Wind take us? I feel the coolness of the breeze fill the room—and I know—our sail will soon change direction.

Will I go where the Wind blows or will I resist with the weight of an anchor?

The bronze fabric balloons high and then whips wildly to the wind. I hear them again—the trees clapping to the rhythm. They know—I know—to trust in the Wind.

lk

Are you yielding to Holy Spirit to lead you? What direction is He taking you in?

Here or somewhere…be real.

Share your journey.

Reflective Scripture

⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight

Proverbs 3:5-6

Relevant Worship

Mighty Breath of God by Jesus Culture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ob5O2ZDQ9Ds

Sink or Swim?

Descending the stairs the coolness danced over her bare toes. Each step was slow and thoughtful. Expectancy beat intensely within her heart. Hope beckoned as she emerged into deeper waters. Still standing she paused only to reflect on the journey before her. Exhaling fear, she drew in a breath of courage and immersed herself in mysterious waters.

Grace came with each stroke. Joy strengthened her kicks. Peace flooded her soul. Her air was His Love.

Moving swiftly she felt destiny within her movements. Invigorated. Empowered. Encouraged. She moved forward easily and with the tenacity for dreams realized. The water was her sky, her arms became wings—she was flying.

Unexpectedly, dirt clogs were thrown in her watery path. Her progress slowed as her vision muddied with disillusionment, disappointment, and discouragement. Her arms grew weary. Her feet dragged behind her. The water choked her. Gasping for air she longed to be free of this suffocating prison. In too deep, her feet could not find safety on the ground. Would she fight to move forward or give up and sink to the bottom? She fought for as long as she could. Her strokes were sloppy. Her feet kicked half-heartedly. She was moving, but not forward. She was going down…

Her heart wept for help.

Through dim waters she caught sight of her Daddy. Hope engulfed her. His presence brought a wave of clarity. His love became her oxygen. Her core strengthened as His long strokes and strong kicks stayed in sync with hers. Navigating the waters effortlessly He guided her out of the murkiness into a clear flow of His Truth.

The pathway of destiny is not void of cheap shots from the adversary. The enemy stands at the pool side throwing dirt clogs of lies and doubts to simply divert us from our purpose—but God’s Truth reigns. Be assured you are His Beloved and you have destiny.

Are you sinking from the enemies lies or are you in sync with the Father’s Truth?

Here or somewhere…be real.

Share you journey.

Relevant Worship

Deep Cries Out by William Matthews (Bethel Church)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJN4aS9uEBo&feature=related

I Look to You by Jenn Johnson (Bethel Church)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWasM-Wj3Xo

Your Love Never Fails by Chris Quilala (Jesus Culture)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoezWBPGRAc

Reflective Scripture

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 6:12

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

I'm Done

“It’s just too much, Lord.”

My heart ached. Tears came. Sobs followed.

It was the movement of Holy Spirit in my heart—alerting me to a time of refinement.

“No Lord. Not again.”

But really I had already said yes. Yes to God. Yes to destiny.

How often I forget destiny costs something. For God’s power to move and flow freely through me I must yield to His refining work. A life pursuing destiny is a life seeking more of Him. The painful reality is there is a process to undergo for there to be less of me.

“I don’t know if I can go another round of this, Lord.”

I wanted a way out—an exit door, somewhere that would allow me to catch my breath. I considered a conversion to the comfortable life of the American Christian. The kind of life where faith never goes deep and only showed up on Sunday mornings. Would anyone even notice? Father God made His heart known through the thundering voice of Mufasa, The Lion King. 

Remember who you are.

“Remember who I am?  Lord, I don’t understand.”

You are Mine.

Confused, I wondered if He heard me right. Didn’t He get it? I couldn’t withstand the heat of the refining fire much longer. For hours I watched my own impurities burn over the coals of purification. It was too much. I wanted out.

Remember who you are.

“Lord, I don’t know what You mean. Are You even listening to me? I’m done. I want out. It’s too much.” Tears streamed down my face in frustration.

Father God’s voice became gentle as Holy Spirit brought revelation.
 

The heat is not just to burn things off of you Beloved.

The heat is meant to burn something within you.
I am burning My identity in you.
It is what you will need to continue on the journey.
Without it you will be lost and without direction to your destiny.

My heart grew light and heavy at the same time. “Why does it have to hurt, Lord?”

Beloved, I am holy. I am marking you with my holiness.

“How long will it take?”

Dear One, I will release you soon.

Draw near and stay with Me.

I won’t leave you alone in this.

Destiny comes with a cost. It’s a willingness to stay on the journey even when it gets hard and even when it becomes unbearable. It’s a belief that the goodness of God is greater than the circumstances we face.

But with the cost comes a reward. The fullness of God’s love revealed to us, the deepening of His presence in our lives, and His identity sealed over our souls. 

It’s not an easy road, but I am choosing to stay on the journey—

How about you?

Here or somewhere…be real.

Share your journey.

Relevant Worship

Whatever You’re Doing (Something Heavenly) by Santus Real
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN9J8eqKovY

Waiting Here for You by Christy Nockels (Passion)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3OEGnH5x8g&ob=av2n

You Won’t Relent by Jesus Culture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sY657h4iZlk&feature=related

Reflective Scripture

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 NIV

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:7 NIV